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2002-07-02 - 11:33 a.m. i decided to change my layout. and now, i'm not sure about it. so, i'm trying to go back to what i had, and it's not working. one would think that since i've been on here for awhile, that i'd be catching on quicker. sadly, i'm more confused than ever. i almost feel panicked. i never shoulda messed with this. don't fuck with what you don't know, right? the thing is, that's how i learn. i'm running on fumes, four hours sleep, and now that i'm in this pickle, i'm too fried to even contemplate contemplating fixing it. whoops!! maybe some other time? i actually like the union jack layout. the BRITISH ARE BETTER huge ass writing is what's breaking the deal. if i could get it to say something else, then i could hang with it. but again, i don't know how to do that stuff. i have nothing against the british. but it's a bit strange that a "mexican american" born, and raised in southern california, u.s.a., would have a big proclamation like that, no? in other news, i've been having great goddam sex with matt. it's GGGGGRRRRREEEEEEAAATT!!! i'm talking, blissed out encounters that last for what seems like a small eternity, while producing mind blowing orgasms. i've always been happy w/ my sex life, but, this is something else entirely. there's other things too. like, when matt looks down at me, and smiles. or when no matter what we're doing we never stop holding hands. or the way he throws his head back when he's almost there. i've been in the strangest mood the last week or so. i sorta think that my being so frustrated, and angry is a factor in the sex stuff. am i showing off, bragging? no. i just realized that while we haven't been together for very long, the fact that the sex is getting more, and more intense is like, evidence as to how close, and in love i am w/ him, and hopefully him w/ me. you just start writing, and things come to you, and revelations are had, and we all sit around, and have a good cry. j/k. but, it's like thinking out loud. something that i find very helpful, since i'm not always great about saying everything i want to, when i want to. whatever. now i'm just being a cheeseball. later... |
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