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2007-08-17 - 4:26 p.m.
when the walls come tumbling down

it lives!!!!!!

yeah, so.......yeah. i'm around. still kicking, etc. etc.

it's been sooo long since i've updated, that i don't know where to begin.

the homelife's good. matty and i are doing really well. love that guy.

we were supposed to go to the sunset junction and street fair in silverlake, saturday. unfortunately, patches emailed and let me know that some family obligations have popped up and she can't make it.

it was her idea for us all to go. it's funny, because matty was like, "we could still go". but, i don't want to go without her.

anyway, monday we're gonna see the beastie boys, so, i'm pretty stoked about that. they're awesome live.

i received my latest issue of rolling stone and saw that puppy zac efron on the cover. this kid is such a classic twinkie that i wouldn't be surprised if he was conceived at a hostess factory.

i guess gyllenhaal is out and this kid's in. oh, the gays. such a fickle lot. i gotta say though, zac's treasure trail? i'd follow that.

la liz had a party semi recently. she had a pool built and re-did her patio and had a pool party. it was fun. matty, the poor guy, can't really tan too much.
it's the irish in him. i, on the other hand, get pretty dark.

i do love all the barbeque's and pool parties and bared flesh, that the summer brings.

matty's so beautiful. after the party, we came home, showered, ended up in bed.
he straddled my chest, and i was just blown away. looking up his chiseled torso, the slight feathering of hair on his chest, tracing my fingers along his "v" cuts, down to his hairy thighs and beyond. i mean, i can't tell you what the sight of him does to me sometimes.

and the way we talk, i mean, really talk to each other is pretty amazing. i think i've changed a lot.

well.........................

i've changed with him. i'm just gonna say what he told me a while back. basically, after a late night heavy conversation kinda scene, he told me something like, "tony, you've finally let me in". like he finally felt it.

and you know what? he was right.

i'm not gonna get like super into it, but, yeah, he was totally right.

of course, none of that means i've completely changed. i'd still be the same level of shy and terrified with the average person.

if it took this long for my boyfriend who i am head over heels in love with, who i live with and share a life with to feel like i've finally opened up, well....you do the math.

i just had to write about that.

as usual, i don't know where to go from there.

-take it / leave it-

older entries:
when the walls come tumbling down - 2007-08-17
long weekend - 2007-05-21
gays gone wild - 2007-04-22
fried and objectified - 2007-03-13
fried and objectified - 2007-03-13

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