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2002-11-30 - 9:30 p.m.
okay, this guys pic was on the singles page on the l.a. weekly website. i wasn't looking at the personals. i was looking for showtimes for "real women have curves" to see with patches, and i just happened to notice him (can you blame me?). if this is a real single guy who's looking for friendship...maybe more, then alls i can say is he needs to get out more. i had a tearful little moment with my mom yesterday. i thanked her for being so cool with matt, and i just got weepy, as is my way when it comes to emotional stuff. i wasn't going to see my mom at all, but i kept getting watery eyed at the strangest things: commercials, christmas music, paint drying, and i knew i needed to go over, and thank her. so, i did and it was exactly what i needed. i just get so full of emotions, and they need to get out. i'm a cheeseball like that. if you know me then you're used to it. it doesn't make it any less embarrassing, but i'll put it this way, if I feel so strongly about my feelings (with my shyness bullshit) that i NEED to tell you how i feel right then & there then i REALLY NEED YOU TO KNOW. we need to do that. it's hard, and scary but things that are worth it shouldn't be so fucking simple. not all the time anyway. i don't know what i'm saying. i know what i mean, but not exactly what i'm saying. if you know what i mean - ha ha. like i said, it's hard to say how i feel. even here on this thing. okay, dorkiness complete. goodnight |
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